Heading home from my mums 

I never really understood the term

Make sure you make the most of it at your mums

Until I myself got married and moved in with my inlaws.

Home is home and when your back at your mums you are yourself again, you can winge, moan, laugh like an idiot and be fun like how you were with your siblings and parents.

I went home Thursday as I finished work early and stayed until Saturday. I was meant to head back Friday but my hubby being the pretty amazing man he is think knew a bit more time would be better so he insisted I come home Saturday.

As I type this on my Victoria Line train to Walthamstow Central I have the hiccups (all of a sudden the decide to make a visit lol) I still feel sad and crappy.

As soon as I left my home no even before I left I could feel this shadow of sadness wash over me and I think it transcended onto my face because my dad kept asking me why I’m sad. I was quite concerned about all the stuff I had to carry back, my little luggage bags (x2) and curry yes curry on top of that I had an appointment to get waxed for 12pm so was concerned about whether I’d make the appointment on time but really I was feeling sad that I had to leave my family again and venture to my new house and family.

The journey home wasn’t bad. I had my book! (God bless Lauren Kate’s beautiful creation The Fallen) but once I got to Walthamstow and decided to pop it I Asda for some shopping woah BIG FUCKING MISTAKE. Asda was packed. And the lines oh god where do I begin with the long lines to pay. It was awful and by then after having made a trip to Poundland before I was feeling tired cos of all the stuff I was holding.

My journey from the shopping centre to the station was so hard. It felt like miles away when it wasn’t. Each step I took, I had to convince my brain I can do it it’s nothing but the weight of all the things I was carrying made it all harder for me. The stairs down and up at the station… a hell of a lot of will power and once I got to the platform to catch the overground for 1 stop the train arrived and I was getting off in 4min.

Then the biggest hurdle the winding road, uphill to my home. I was huffing, moaning, crying, contemplating whether I would survive this. I had all these bags and I was cussing myself for even doing this. After many stops and motivational talks I had with myself about how I can do it. I did it and I as I stumbled into my home the hard puffing could be heard to the other end of the house.

I was tired and so I unpacked all the stuff I bought. And saw my parents gave me more curry, curry which I was going to cook! Put all my baking ingredients away and popped upstairs. I called my mum and had a bit of a moan and a go at her why she packed the extra curry because the whole purpose for me popping into Asda was to buy mackerel! I was hot, fluttered and exhausted.

It was after I locked off the phone I realised how rude I must have sounded and how much I miss my mum and burst into tears. I looked around the room at how messy my husband had left it and wandered I wished I had stayed at my parents for longer.

After I let it all out I wiped away my tears and decided to tidy this messy room and that’s my story

I had attempted to type this blog yesterday but didn’t get a chance to finish it and now it’s Sunday. Sunday 25 December nearly 12pm and I am in bed really needing to get up and go downstairs and face what is in store for the rest of the day

There is still so much I need to learn and get used to in this somewhat Alien house. That being said it’s not bad, infact it’s nice still.

Toodles x

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